Gary Thomas is a bestselling author and international speaker whose ministry brings people closer to Christ and closer to others. gets really old not to mention contradictory and confusing. Share. Marriage has its challenges, but when these are faced head-on, our marriage can nurture our devotional lives in enriching ways. Too many marriage books assume that both spouses are going to participate in reading and enacting the steps given in the book; this is all about how my relationship with God is imaged and expressed through my marriage ⦠This book doesn't promise seven steps to a better marriage, nor does it even promise to make your marriage better. There are many applications of this teaching, but where Thomas excels is his ability to take the knowledge that we will all one day stand before God and he uses it as a tool to spur us on towards loving our spouses well. Enlila gets rid of Kala. I definitely recommend this one to married couples, and even engaged couples. Rather than saying in effect, “will you do this for me?” when we propose, the real question should be, “will you accept what I want to give?” If marriage is daily approached from this perspective, there can be no issue of disillusionment on the part of either partner. In the throes of my soon-to-be-wed state, I didn't take the words of this book too seriously. It is worth making sacrifices now to receive glory, honor, and immortality there. Thomas' perspective - that marriage is designed to produce holiness more than happiness in our lives - is refreshing and rings abundantly true. As an engaged woman, I truly appreciate this perspective. Plus, some of the other books written by Thomas, such as Sacred Marriage, are very good. Look at your marriage through the lens of – What am I learning? Excellent book on marriage which right out of the gate challenges the prevailing social myths about marriage and its purpose in society. This book really made me think about my marriage and where I am placing my priorities. Beauty is often birthed in struggle. The fact that my wife is made in the image of God calls me to a far more noble response than simply refraining from being condescending to her. I have read bits and pieces of this book before and it really helps my spiritual and married life. He points out that this is a relatively recent phenomenon and that marriage was not always perceived this way. My women's group used this book to guide discussions on a weekly basis for about six months. So I was pleasantly surprised to find myself really enjoy this book. There are no lessons to be learned when a husband dominates his wife. This book instructs both the persons involved in moving closer to God through the art of Marriage. Author Gary Thomas affirms the value and purpose of marriage in this book. He wrote largely from his point of view as a husband and man seeking God, so while I found it very helpful and even inspiring that men out there work so hard at their marriage and relationship with God, there was just something missing. The notion of hieros gamos does not always presuppose literal sexual intercourse in ⦠I thought to myself, "Of course I'm going to love and serve my husband. When this happens, the spiritually immature respond by pulling back from their spouse. God doesn’t turn his eyes when a married couple goes to bed. **, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. But does it have to be entirely joyless? Care to travel to past times for some serious drama? God is not served will if we turn off everyone around us in our selfish pursuit of devotion. Breaking down marriage into several spiritual components, the book ultimately concludes that "it is not good for man to be alone", and that our marriages serve a larger purpose than just comfort on earth. ⢠What color is your spouseâs toothbrush? Our culture's view of marriage and relationships in general is a selfish one: Will this person make me happy? Personal Growth & Life Transformation Books, Chapter 2 Discussion and Reflection Questions, 42 New and Upcoming Historical Fiction Novels. These fears have been analyzed for you in a later chapter. .c_dVyWK3BXRxSN3ULLJ_t{border-radius:4px 4px 0 0;height:34px;left:0;position:absolute;right:0;top:0}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;margin-top:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._33jgwegeMTJ-FJaaHMeOjV{border-radius:9001px;height:32px;width:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._1wQQNkVR4qNpQCzA19X4B6{height:16px;margin-left:8px;width:200px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:12px 0}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._29TSdL_ZMpyzfQ_bfdcBSc{-ms-flex:1;flex:1}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx .JEV9fXVlt_7DgH-zLepBH{height:18px;width:50px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._3YCOmnWpGeRBW_Psd5WMPR{height:12px;margin-top:4px;width:60px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN{height:18px;margin-bottom:4px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2E9u5XvlGwlpnzki78vasG{width:230px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN.fDElwzn43eJToKzSCkejE{width:100%}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2kNB7LAYYqYdyS85f8pqfi{width:250px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._1XmngqAPKZO_1lDBwcQrR7{width:120px}._3XbVvl-zJDbcDeEdSgxV4_{border-radius:4px;height:32px;margin-top:16px;width:100%}._2hgXdc8jVQaXYAXvnqEyED{animation:_3XkHjK4wMgxtjzC1TvoXrb 1.5s ease infinite;background:linear-gradient(90deg,var(--newCommunityTheme-field),var(--newCommunityTheme-inactive),var(--newCommunityTheme-field));background-size:200%}._1KWSZXqSM_BLhBzkPyJFGR{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetBackgroundColor);border-radius:4px;padding:12px;position:relative;width:auto} The righteousness God seeks is a persistent righteousness, a commitment to continue making the right decisions even when you feel pulled in the opposite direction. Marriage holds a mirror up to your sin. When I am thankful for my spouse, the control that the familiarity of contempt has on me is broken. Proverbs calls us to delight in our spouse only. Sometimes, God uses the Pain inside us to make us achieve greater things. Refresh and try again. Everyone got something out of the discussions that took place despite their current situation. Brian and I had to read it as a part of our Marriage Counseling. Marriage can be a holy place. You may also be pleased to know that Thomas has a chapter solely dedicated to the sexual relationship in marriage! Gary Thomas' concise. What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy? We have to apply ourselves to understanding, love, and patience – we must commit ourselves to a pursuit of virtue. In a God-centered view, we preserve our marriage because it brings glory to God and points a sinful world to a reconciling Creator.”. Dissension in my marriage??? We are called to stretch ourselves, to find out how we can learn to respect this person with whom we’ve become so familiar. This was an excellent read to supplement premarital counseling for my fiancé and I, but it is also would be a wonderful tool for seasoned couples going through a rough patch. Just as celibates use abstinence and religious hermits use isola - tion, so we can use marriage for the same purposeâ to grow in our service, obedience, character, pursuit, and love of ⦠To be a Christian is to be a self-volunteering servant. Romantic love has no elasticity to it. ~smile~ While a lot of books talk about practical sexual tips and offer ⦠The group contained women with kids, without kids, single, divorce, remarried, widowed, and with traditional marriages. Both will put grow in godliness above affluence, public opinion, or personal ease. In the throes of my soon-to-be-wed state, I didn't take the words of this book too seriously. It does contain practical tools, but what married Christians most need is help in becoming holier husbands and wives. Gary Thomas, best-selling author of Sacred Marriage, believes that one word can bring hope, light and life into any marriage: cherish. My perspective of marriage has been greatly altered and I look forward to the years ahead that God gives us with a renewed pass. Christian love must be chased after, aspired to, and practiced. I pray it helps you as much as it has helped me! NEVER!" She said thought was helpful for married people, but she really wanted to give it to all her unmarried friends because she thought it would set up some more realistic expectations for marriage (what, itâs not all rainbows and unicorns?). He points out that this is a relatively recent phenomenon and that marriage was not always perceived this way. ._33axOHPa8DzNnTmwzen-wO{display:block;padding:0 16px;width:100%}.isNotInButtons2020 ._33axOHPa8DzNnTmwzen-wO{font-size:14px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:32px;text-transform:uppercase} Of course I am going to grow spiritually. Gary Thomas did a powerful job of showing how marriage is not about our indiviual happiness but about how we can grow in holiness. The deification of the feminine, mother earth, and masculine, god of the sky, is basic to mythological and religious thinking. A powerful look at marriage as a means to making you "holy", not "happy". Chapter VI THE SPRING FESTIVALS IN SUMERIAN ROYAL IDEOLOGYIn the sixth chapter we discuss the connection of ritual and mythological representations of the spring period with the ideology of royal authority (king as Dumuzi and king as Ninurta; enthronization and sacred marriage).A consecutive study of all Sumerian sources ⦠Set on a Greek island in the Bronze Age. Does this book have any discussion questions? 4.5*** There was a lot to appreciate in this book. (I listened to this.). I will confess that part of my annoyance with the book is his complementarian view of gender roles, which I staunchly disagree with. A theory: behind virtually every case of marital dissatisfaction lies unrepentant sin. As our partners and their weaknesses become more familiar to us, respect often becomes harder to give. A wife who plans an unforgettable sexual experience for her husband is serving God. 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It is not sufficient to merely voice our assent to a few doctrines. It can never be stretched; it simply shatters. Weâd love your help. Waterlily is bought in marriage by Sacred Horse, a well-respected man from another camp circle. Thomas does a lot to deconstruct selfishness, and show how harmful it is in a marriage. That sounded a little crazy, so let me explain. Brian and I had to read it as a part of our Marriage Counseling. Then, when pleasure fails, the relationship often ends. Though far more subtle, it is these dangers that can destroy the homes of believers, shredding their marriages. Hieros gamos or Hierogamy (Greek ἱεÏá½¸Ï Î³Î¬Î¼Î¿Ï, ἱεÏογαμία "holy marriage") is a sacred marriage that plays out between a god and a goddess, especially when enacted in a symbolic ritual where human participants represent the deities.. Abraham Lincoln gave a powerful message on November 19, 1863, at the Battle of Gettysburg during the American civil war and it is considered as one of the greatest speeches ever made in the American Soil. Thomas starts off with a quick review of the Romantic period and its influence on how we perceive marriage and what we expect out of it: un-dying romantic love and bliss, a partner who's focused solely on your needs, etc. I definitely grew spiritually by reading this book. He used Lincoln to deliver a Message when he was at his lowest and when people criticized his insistence on fighting the civil war. I thought to myself, "Of course I'm going to love and serve my husband. gets really old not to mention contradictory and confusing. What this book does do is make you evaluate yourself so that YOU become better. Rather, it is a book that teaches that marriage has a place in an active and healthy spiritual life, and is a spiritual calling, as much as celibacy was to the faithful nuns and monks of the middle ages. I can't stand "how to" books and really hate being led by the nose to a specific conclusion. THE CHILDREN OF URANUS AND GAIA ._3Im6OD67aKo33nql4FpSp_{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetBorderColor);border-radius:5px 5px 4px 4px;overflow:visible;word-wrap:break-word;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);padding:12px}.lnK0-OzG7nLFydTWuXGcY{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;padding-bottom:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-navIcon)} Pin. Ibbi-Sim starts to undress her. The reason it feels good is because God designed it so. The only reason I did not give it 5 stars is because it was written by a man, Gary Thomas. It’s something you work for. This is not your average book which makes you believe that everything is perfect in a Marriage. What if they viewed meeting the other partner’s demands as part of their own spiritual formation? A summary of Part X (Section5) in Upton Sinclair's The Jungle. I could say a lot more but perhaps the best thing I can say is that I see myself re-reading this book many times as I grow older with my wife. Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read. In both the Old and New Testaments, marriage is viewed as an analogy of the covenant and union of God with his people. While the male sexual organ has multiple functions, the female clitoris has just one – sexual pleasure. Rather than tell me how I can change my marriage, this book talks about changing my heart. .Rd5g7JmL4Fdk-aZi1-U_V{transition:all .1s linear 0s}._2TMXtA984ePtHXMkOpHNQm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;margin-bottom:4px}.CneW1mCG4WJXxJbZl5tzH{border-top:1px solid var(--newRedditTheme-line);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:none;fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:middle;margin-bottom:2px;margin-left:4px;cursor:pointer}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover ._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{display:inline-block}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs{border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B.IeceazVNz_gGZfKXub0ak,._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk{margin-top:25px;left:-9px}._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:focus-within,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:hover{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border:none;padding:8px 8px 0}._25yWxLGH4C6j26OKFx8kD5{display:inline}._2YsVWIEj0doZMxreeY6iDG{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;padding:4px 6px}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;margin-left:auto;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg,._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq{font-weight:700;color:#ff4500;text-transform:uppercase;margin-right:4px}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq,.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-weight:400;-ms-flex-preferred-size:100%;flex-basis:100%;margin-bottom:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX{margin-top:6px}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._3MAHaXXXXi9Xrmc_oMPTdP{margin-top:4px} So why would the unmarried girl want to read a book about marriage? If we sense alienation from, or lack of affection toward, our spouse, the first place we should look is how we’re doing with the Lord. When we are most tired, most worn down, and feeling more sorry for ourselves than we ever have before, we have the opportunity to confront the feelings of self-pity by getting up and serving our mate. One of marriage’s primary purposes is to teach us how to forgive. To stop moving towards out spouse is to stop loving him or her. I don't read a lot of books on marriage or parenting anymore because you have to admit the formula of "you're doin' it wrong, let me show you the one true way!" Prayer pushes eternity back into our lives, making God ever more relevant to the way we live our lives. Summary: Based, in part, on a Tumblr meta by sillier-things about hieros gamos rituals in ancient religions. âSacred Marriageâ fits that bill. Maturity is reached by continuing to move forward past the pain and apathy. Sacred Marriage uncovers the mystery of Godâs overarching purpose. A wife who truly loves her husband will want to see him grow in godliness. We allow marriage to point beyond itself when we accept two central missions: becoming the people God created us to be and doing the work God has given us to do. The trouble is that there are perfectly clean movies that are free of obscene language, nudity and violence yet still portray a system of values out of sync with a Christian worldview. Gary Thomas' concise and relatable writing, combined with his use of scriptural truths, sacred writings, and contemporary references get across a simple, but under-heard message; that marriage is a spiritual discipline. This is a ground-breaking concept in today's world of serial divorces. Summary. There is discussion of selflessness and sacrifice but it's in a larger context than "do this to make your marriage work." .LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH{fill:var(--newRedditTheme-actionIcon);height:18px;width:18px}.LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH rect{stroke:var(--newRedditTheme-metaText)}._3J2-xIxxxP9ISzeLWCOUVc{height:18px}.FyLpt0kIWG1bTDWZ8HIL1{margin-top:4px}._2ntJEAiwKXBGvxrJiqxx_2,._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{height:24px;vertical-align:middle;width:24px}._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-inline-flexbox;display:inline-flex;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center} That sounded a little crazy, so let me explain. Spiri - tual growth is the main theme; marriage is simply the context. But if you accept marriage as a life-long proposition, then chances are, there will be times, perhaps seasons, when you simply do have to endure it, and I have yet to discover another book that advises people how to endure those times w. Sacred Marriage is ânot a book that seeks to tell you how to have a happier marriage.â Itâs not even a book that seeks to tell you how to have a better marriage than you currently have. A transformative view of marriage. Your marriage is more than a sacred covenant with another person. Sacred Marriage and Sacred Prostitution. The one chapter we lingered on the longest was. A book I plan to read every year. This is a bit of a lengthy summary, but here are my key points from every chapter. So why would the unmarried girl want to read a book about marriage? The one chapter we lingered on the longest was the chapter on sex in marriage. I first came to know of this book through our Marriage Counsellor. In other words, service not only washes others’ feet but it’s letting your own feet be washed as well. The beauty of marriage is that it confronts our selfishness. Check out the summary of the next chapter of the Genesis replay, which will air today, Monday (15), on Record: Sneaky and armed, Lugali invades Teráâs tent. He goes on to build a strong case for a "servant" model for marriage where the primary goal is to subordinate your needs/desires to serve your partner. Here's why: I got rid of my copy before finishing it (roughly four years ago). More than seeing marriage as a mutual comfort, we must see it as a word picture of the most important news humans have ever received – that there is a divine relationship between God and his people. A must read. A true Christian marriage proposal is an offer, not a request. We shouldn’t turn our eyes from God when we share intimate moments with our spouse. A place where you can testify about what God has done. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another", Thomas says. 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