Douchiest College, Sunburned Tits Conference. What college majors are the douchiest? **Nonalcoholic Drink of Choice: **Muscle Milk Light with ice cubes made from toxic groundwater. List of College Majors. **Douchey Alums: **Joe Biden, Chris Christie, Bob Greene. **When Asked Where You Go to College, Will Respond: **"In New Haven.". r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. ... Hit the Jump for the top 25 douchiest colleges in America . **In Ten Years Will Be: **Professional football player; professional basketball player; some rich farmer's chosen politician, propping up land values on dying orange groves with center-right state legislation. **Douchey Affectations: **Because you can't be bothered with "fashion," you wear old Gap jeans, Havaianas flip-flops, a T-shirt with the name of an obscure tech company that ends in a y—Blippy or Swipely or Smackly or Webbly—underneath a Stanford sweatshirt. Stay on top of the information you need to navigate the admissions process amid the COVID-19 pandemic. **Douchey Affectations: **Baggy cutoff camo shorts; pristine all-white Nike Air Force 1's with ankle socks poking out just so; Tim Tebow jersey only partly concealing the rip tattoo for your homey on the upper biceps; sun-kissed hair, wad chest; pierced tongue, or at least eyebrow. Players: Tony Manfred, an intern at Business Insider and a 2011 graduate of Cornell; Peter Littleton, Ph.D, contributor to GQ and co-author of The Roger's & Littleton Guide to America's Douchiest Colleges.. RELATED: Big Boi Busted; Larry David Has Groupies The Opening Serve: GQ released their "10 Douchiest Colleges in America" feature last week--an exclusive excerpt from Littleton's Book. **Underground Campus Activity: **Screening of Fantasia, followed by cuddle party, followed by communal "smoking" of bubble-gum cigarettes and eventual doffing of overshirts, followed by furtive, conscience-staining masturbation session. The question isn't whether or not one will be a douchebag in college—we're all a little douchey at college, to be honest. Also: Ken Wheaton links to this GQ: America's 25 Douchiest Colleges, hilarious and lets you laugh at the colleges that turned you down, until you get to your own. Fuck you, Columbia. America's 25 Douchiest Colleges: Humor: GQ. _Douchiest College, Fake Ivy League Conference _. The shock of returning to the world of social norms can be profound. **Most Popular Majors: **Theatre, Creative Writing, Rehab Facility Studies. Tel 416978 5000. It's a joke. Account & Lists Account Returns & Orders. The Most Out-of-Control Fraternities in America America’s worst frats: from over-the-top racism and hazing deaths to sexual assaults and caches of automatic weapons **Claim to Fame: **It has a journalism school that's not awful. Art degrees. I, myself, try my hardest not to be that way, and I'm sure a lot of other art students don't mean to be either. **The Thing About This Magic Figure: **He went to Brown and doesn't really drink. - fivedogsbooks.co.nz - NZ Books - Order Today . Some of the highlights include Morehouse, Notre Dame, and USC, but the best part is the explanation for Duke not being number one. I'm, like, slaying the room. America s Douchiest Colleges - 9780811878876 - Free NZ Shipping - Honestly, everyone acts at least a little bit douchy when they re in college. It's a myth! **Douchey Alums: **Herbert Hoover, Mike Mussina, John Elway, William Rehnquist, and the biggest douchebucket of the twenty-first century, Tiger Woods (who didn't even graduate). Or, like, to be Shia LaBeouf, only not as much of a pussy. **Home of: **The "Mitt Romney for President" douche. The more pertinent question for prospective students is, "What kind of douchebag do you aspire to be?" So while most college co-eds spend their summers polishing their resumes with fancy internships, the most self-confident handsome airheads at BYU spend their summers making tons of cash in “summer sales.” They then return $50,000 richer (and douchier) and inevitably blow their savings on Range Rovers and what they call “designer jeans.” Oh, and memberships at … We've got articles, videos and forum discussions that provide answers to all of your test prep, admissions and college search questions. Like, Where can you go if you want to major in Jet Skiing? Get so drunk on grain punch that you pass out on the grass, somewhere between Dane Cook's act and the Steve Miller Band. MajorGeeks.Com » News » … It's not even cool technology. Political Science tends to produce some winners. 10 “Douchiest College.” (CU Independent file/Lauren Walter) Students at CU are taking issue with Gentleman’s Quarterly recent ranking of the university as the 10th “douchiest” college in America. Americas 25 douchiest colleges Quiz Stats. Now obviously this isn't grounds for art students to just be dicks to everyone else who isn't an art student, there probably isn't a real excuse for that at all, and I'm sorry you have come across the worst of us. To revisit this article, visit My Profile, then View saved stories. **Favorite Pick-up Line: **"Hey. You have 17,000 Facebook friends, some of whom you've met before, and you plan on starting a company and getting filthy rich someday so that later you can "do good." Affectations: Comfy Thai meditation pants in gold and puce; pretending not to be that horny; needlepointing the first sentence of Maxine … **Unofficial Motto: **I can tell you don't respect me, you asshole. Ever hear a song and swear it’s written for you and your current heartache? I am sorry that you have had to deal with the ones that are douchey. But we'd rather not rank Duke number one at anything." © 2021 Condé Nast. Meet Kai Skip for Now ... America's 25 Douchiest Colleges: GQ Features on men.style.com. Buy America's Douchiest Colleges 01 by Chronicle Books (ISBN: 9780811878876) from Amazon's Book Store. What college majors are the douchiest? Cool Story, Bro: Penn State was voted #2 douchiest college in America according to a 2011 GQ ranking. Also was an English major in college and I couldn't agree more. Douchey Affectations: Deep suspicion that you may end up being president of the United States; outspoken pride in New Haven (many parts of which scare you); wearing your “sexual flexibility” on your boho sleeve; the belief that, despite the overwhelming odds, you are truly, truly special. But … Order My Reading List? And as expected, the reaction within the Big Red community has been mixed. I wouldn't necessarily call it douchey, but engineering students seem to love letting people know they're engineering students. In 1917, he created a small men’s college called Deep Springs College, on a working ranch in Deep Springs Valley, California. Here to help with this major life decision is the only college guide to rank and recommend schools based on their level of douchiness, including illustrated analysis of douchey student affectations, fashions, course offerings, school chants, pickup techniques, extracurricular activities, mascots, and much more. The expert authors of America's Douchiest Colleges present a Deadspin exclusive ranking of America's leading douchey football schools, in order of douchiness. Conference. Free shipping for many products! **Home of: **The "My parents are so rich, let's just light this pile of money on fire and watch it burn" douche. I want to get a jump on it, but I'm pretty unfamiliar with the authors. Ad Choices. How about if you're a trust-fund type … **Overheard at Brunch on Saturday Morning: **"What do you guys wanna do today: tailgate at the game, get shitfaced, eat some pizza, and break some windows, or tailgate at the game, get shitfaced, eat some pizza, and break some windows?". Too much money, too many people with superiority complexes. **Douchey Affectations: **Magic underwear; extremely well-pressed, stain-resistant clothes; mini-fridge stocked with Sierra Mist; blond carpet that actually matches the drapes. The 10 Douchiest Colleges in America It's college—a certain amount of douchebaggery is acceptable. Deep Springs College, located 40 miles from Bishop, California, on an isolated cattle ranch in Deep Springs Valley. Here, in this exclusive excerpt from their groundbreaking new book, Photo: Al Diaz/Miami Herald/MCT via Getty Images. Plus, any idiot can hack into that shit in two seconds. Welcome to Yale, red-hot center of the secret societies: the Carillonneurs, the Lizzie, Mace and Chain, Skull and Bones, Sage and Chalice, the Dramat, Mory's...and, of course, the chronic masturbators' club, also known as the Whiffenpoofs! Honestly, everyone acts at least a little bit douchy when they're in college. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Next on the list is Penn State (for liking college football) followed by Yale (for obvious reasons), Stanford (because they use Facebook), and Pepperdine (because they're … "Duke is probably number one. My Watched Forums You aren't watching any forums. Affectations: A belief that grades, majors, and course requirements are just another form of cultural hegemony; using the word hegemony. Possibly a professional golfer. In 1994, the college voted against coeducation, but the controversial subject has … **Home of: **The "chip on shoulder" douche. **Douchey Alums: **Andy from "The Office," Keith Olbermann, Ann Coulter, Adolph Coors, Jr., Lauren Weisberger. Will you marry me?". It's all holy. **Core Belief: **That you are above California, even though you do love the weather. Right, I got my degree from Cornell, and now I'm a bellhop. For one, my school didn't even offer the majors this book listed. Posted by Sue at 9:13 PM. Kai can provide tips and support as you research and apply to colleges, and explore majors and careers. The university’s reputation for marijuana use prompted their recognition as GQ’s No. But, you know, first you have to get filthy rich. **Douchey Alums: **Joe Scarborough, Steve Spurrier, Camilo Villegas, Erin Andrews, Gatorade. save hide report. I got my required reading list for a British Lit. **If You Could Read the Thought Bubble Over Campus: **You know what I'm sick of hearing? **Most Popular Majors: **Theatre, Creative Writing, Rehab Facility Studies. Which is your way of feeling superior to the "robots" at Harvard and Princeton. This rigorously researched, stereotypically accurate, … 3. Because at Pepperdine, being Christian isn't like all about washing lepers or giving money away or whatever. **Home of: **The "Skull and Bones" douche. I think you're beautiful. Facebook is stupid. **Most Popular Halloween Costumes: **Joe Paterno, "baby" Joe Paterno, "lady" Joe Paterno, "hooker" Joe Paterno. class in the fall. St.George, Queen's Park. I got my required reading list for a British Lit. I didn't attend the Ag School! How cool would that be? The question is, what kind of douche do you aspire to be? Olivia. **In Twenty Years Will Be: **Bitterly disappointed that you're not president. As most Cornellians have probably read by now, GQ magazine posted an online piece titled “The 10 Douchiest Colleges in America” ( … The Last September, … **In Twenty Years Will Be: **Pursuing an advanced advanced degree. It even said we were full of … **Typical Gator Growl Itinerary: **Smoke a bunch of schwaggy weed and crank the hip-hop and Godsmack on your way to the Swamp. Press J to jump to the feed. We know if you’re an Auburn fan you hate Alabama. **Guilty Pleasures: **"So You Think You Can Dance," Glenn Beck's novel, Mr. Pibb. Then I swig deeply from a bottle of Voss water, announce my IPO, and walk offstage to thunderous applause. The question is, what kind of douche do you aspire to be? 18 comments. America's 25 Douchiest Colleges The question isn't whether you're a douche bag when you go to college. Read honest and unbiased product reviews from our users. **Douchey Affectations: **Adderall addiction; on-again, off-again affair with half sister in Geneva; gray wool beanie hat; sestinas and cinquains, but mainly sestinas. **Most Likely to be Heard on a First Date: **"Jesus, I can't feel my face.". **In Ten Years Will Be: **Pursuing an advanced degree. https://deadspin.com/the-25-douchiest-football-schools-in-america-5840716 Visit our COVID-19 resource page. Organized. Well, choke on this, you pretentious eating-club ass wipes: Janet Reno! Mormon. Aktualności; Usługi; Specjaliści; Galeria; Kontakt; Diety; most pretentious colleges in america Thankfully, we’ve got people there doing the hard work for us so all we have to do is crank it up and belt it out. Keep the Penn guy's application on file! **Favorite Pasttime Directly Linked to That Ratio: **Downloading anime bondage porn, followed by what you like to call "self-administered hand-jobs.". You in?". The image of the self-involved and over-partied university attendee has become an archetype in college-aimed films … God forbid you mention that you read some Nicholas Sparks over break instead of Moby Dick. Skip to main content.sg. _, **Life Goals: **Stay celibate until marriage; buy a townhouse in Newport Beach; convert all gays; meet someone with the "three Hs: hot, humble, and holy. He has the new ox and an albino python that will look awesome around your shirtless neck as you walk the boardwalk. “Every major change at Deep Springs has been opposed by the students,” said Christopher Breiseth, former college president. The critical culture also goes way too far. We know if you’re a Texass fan you hate Oklahoma. Cornell isn't a crazy fratty Greek campus, but it's definitely a major part of the partying social life. Have to be carried back to some stranger's dorm room, where you wake up to cheers from the goateed strangers who brought you home and cracked eggs in your hair and drew cocks and balls on your forehead with dry-erase markers. **Douchey Affectations: **College stuff, only drunker. Alpha Delta, Dartmouth College Dartmouth, which provided the real-life inspiration for Animal House, has long had a reputation for bad greek behavior. University of Florida. Click here to add some to your list. Or: president of the United States. **Douchey Alumn Nonpareil: **Bret Easton Ellis. How could feeling this good be, you know, bad? Like, you're "allowed" to like an author or two, but you better be able to defend why until you're out of breath. Brown Affectations: A belief that grades, majors, and course requirements are just another form of cultural hegemony; using the word hegemony. Hello Select your address Best Sellers Today's Deals New Releases Books Electronics Gift Ideas Customer Service Home Computers Gift Cards Sell So, how should I tackle this? Gender studies and anything that produces a theater kid. **Sexual Fantasy: **Imagine if Transformers were real. **In Ten Years Will Be: **On the fast track (to elected office, partnership, fame for something arty) while still dressing as if you were reading history at Oord in 1946. **In Ten Years Will Be: **White. is a unique institution of higher learning. Douchiest College, Belligerent Drunk Masses Conference. #3 douchiest college in America. 31 replies. Was your dad in the CIA? Sanus. Douchiest College, “Where’d You Go to College” Conference Home of: The “Skull and Bones” douche. Does it make you feel powerful, too? Douchiest College, Future Meteorologists of America Conference, **Home of: **The "Heidi Montag Bible fellowship" douche. Two years of Spanish, plus an additional 3 credits. It's college—a certain amount of douchebaggery is acceptable. Popular Quizzes Today. **Douchey Alums: **Ahmed Chalabi, Paul Krugman, Carly Fiorina, John Thain, Charles Murray, a million Nobel winners, astronauts, and the "Car Talk" guys. It must have been pretty hard to narrow it down to just 25. August 2009 edited August 2009. And to complete the hat trick: What if Megan Fox was washing a Jeep in cutoffs? This is Red Bull with vodka in it? The material on this site may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except with the prior written permission of Condé Nast. I'm sorry, but when UT, which is easily the coolest school in Texas, is on the douchiest colleges list, but yet ridiculously *****y schools, such as Texas A&M and Texas Tech, aren't, I just can't help but wonder how the person who wrote this came up with their list. Here, in this exclusive excerpt from their groundbreaking new book, The Rogers & Littleton Guide to America's Douchiest Colleges, H. L. Rogers and Peter Littleton, Ph.D., rank… But surely after hearing stuff like the things I listed above all your life, you can see how that would be a liiiiiiittle frustrating. "); BassBox Pro installed in the trunk of tricked-out Scion ; weakness for Cinnabon; rampant heterosexuality.

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